The following is the text of a telephone interview with Charlie Morris, conducted by Authentic Blues magazine:
Authentic Blues: 'tisn't blues.
Charlie Morris: What the f**ck you mean? Of course this is blues.
AB: No, 'tisn't.
CM: Yes it is!
AB: No, 'tisn't.
CM: Yes it f**ckin' well is!
AB: No, 'tisn't.
CM: Listen, pal. The tunes are all 1-4-5, the words are all about women, drinking and gambling. There's lots of solos, the keyboard player is playing a real Hammond B-3, and I'm playing an ES-335, a Strat and a Paul. If that ain't blues, what the hell is?
AB: There's no steel guitar.
CM: Well, yeah, maybe not, but there is a slide guitar solo on one tune, Cruisin.
AB: Yeah, but that's not a National steel guitar, its just played on your Les Paul or some such. It's probably even a metal slide. There's also a sax solo on that tune, if I recall correctly.
CM: There's harp on several other tunes.
AB: A few harp tracks does not a blues album make.
CM: Well, it doesn't make it non-blues because I had a sax on one tune, either. What the hell kind of an interview you call this, anyway?
AB: Face it Chuck, even if you play blues, you'll never be blues, because you're just a young white middle-class...
CM: Now, wait a minute, mister! You can call me what you want, but I am definitely not "middle class."
AB: You have your own Web site, don't you?
CM: Well, yes.
AB: Yup-pee! Yup-pee! Oh, excellent, dude! I'll call you on my cellphone from my beemer! What's bluesy about that?
CM: What's the point of all this crap? Isn't what the album sounds like what matters? Who cares what size or color I am as long as people like the music?
AB: Oh, I'm sure your CD is very good. I'm just saying it isn't blues.
CM: Wait a minute! Are you saying you haven't even listened to my CD, Bluer Than Thou?
AB: My friend, I receive thousands of CDs every week. I don't have time to listen to them all.
CM: You had time to call me for this p**s-poor excuse for an interview, you pretentious, no-writing half a motherf**ker!
AB: 'tisn't blues.
CM: (click)